Operation Callen Cheer
by Loads of Randomness
Summary: aka The Great Lollipop Caper. Callen's not having the best of days. Though it would go an awful lot better if lollipops didn't keep appearing out of thin air! Bit of pointless fun.
1. Of Paranoia and Suspicions

"All clear?" a voice whispered; face hidden behind a handily placed plant.

"Yes, and you don't need to whisper you know. You know that they're all out in the field," an exasperated voice replied.

"Were trying to be _sneaky_ here."

"Ok, fine. Put one in his pen holder."

"You still putting one in his gym bag?"

"Of course."

"Brave move."

"No one's in the gym at the moment."

"True."

"How many of these did you even buy?"

"It was a four for three deal."

"Uh huh."

"I put one in his jacket like you said by the way."

"His jacket?"

"Uh, yeah."

"No, I said _I_ was going to put one in his jacket.

"Oh."

"Crap, that's them, never mind."

* * *

Callen sighed almost inaudibly. He closed his eyes and rested his head against the window of Sam's Challenger as he was waiting for his partner to return from the building he had managed to charm his way into. He was hoping to get a look at some of the files or account numbers they needed.

Today was not a good day for him. It never was a good day. He shifted in his seat slightly. This was stupid. It was the anniversary of him getting shot. Five times. The fifth one too. He was fine. Alive, that's what counted. Normally this like this didn't bother him, hazards of the job and all that. But this one did. It always did.

Five bullets. Five scars. That was impressive even for him. He rubbed at his chest absent-mindedly, trying not to think of it.

Of course, that made him think about it all the more. Callen was sure that there was a proper term for that. Nate would know. Not that he was going to talk to Nate about this. Everyone had already been needlessly worried about that incident. Hell, even Deeks and Nell got anxious looking when it was brought up and they hadn't even been with them. He was fine.

Really.

He sighed heavily and reached for a lollipop. There was usually one in his pocket. His fingers grasped around one-or three? What the? Callen frowned and opened his pocket wider to see inside. Three lollipops? How did that happen? He bought the things in bulk and stashed them about the place so there were always a few handy but he didn't usually put more than one or two in the same place. He'd really go through them if he did that and he didn't need Sam yapping on about his teeth and sugar consumption any more than he already did.

Pulling all three out, Callen frowned at them. There was the yellow one he'd thrown in there and the two unexplained ones were purple. His favourite. They _looked_ legit. Felt it too. The branding was right. Why would someone want to plant a lollipop on him? Was it even real?

He shook his head. He was being suspicious about _lollipops _of all things.

Feeling slightly uneasy, he picked one of the purple ones and unwrapped it. Nothing out of the ordinary about that. Suspiciously, he gave it a tentative lick. It was real. Weird. Callen looked at it even more closely, nose almost touching it. It even smelled ok. Should he? Shrugging to himself he took the plunge and stuck the whole thing in his mouth. There were worse ways to go if this was a problem he thought as he sucked on it.

He hadn't had a purple on in a while after all.

* * *

"I'm going crazy," he announced to his partner, throwing himself into the passenger seat after doing his own reconnaissance and earning himself a glare from Sam.

"Going?" Sam asked with a quirked eyebrow.

Callen shot him a dark look.

"Why are you 'going' insane?" he asked placatingly.

Callen didn't say anything but dumped the handful of lollipops onto the dashboard in response.

"They better not be sticky," Sam warned, picking one up and inspecting it closely. "Lollipops?" he queried.

"I'm finding them _everywhere_," Callen said in frustration, side-eyeing said treats suspiciously.

"Your problem being?" Sam asked, setting the candy back down. "You love these things. Especially the purple ones."

"I didn't put them there," Callen all but hissed, getting annoyed that he wasn't getting across just how weird this whole situation was.

"Seriously, G?"

"I'm telling you Sam; they just keep appearing!" he insisted.

"Because you stash the damn things everywhere," Sam pointed out then frowned at Callen. "You better not have hidden them in my car again."

Callen gave him an innocent look.

Sighing loudly in frustration, Sam reached his hand down the side of the driver's seat. It re-emerged with a blue one.

"G!" he complained, holding it between two fingers in disgust. "Really?"

Callen grabbed it off him with a grin. "Like you said, so I always have them."

"You're worse than my kids," Sam grumbled. "At least they listen when I say 'no food in the car'."

"It's not going to make a mess," Callen said, trying to put it back in its hiding spot.

Sam slapped his hand away and glared at him.

"I should just dump you out here and make you walk back."

* * *

"Aargh!" came Callen's cry of frustration from his desk.

Kensi and Deeks looked at each other, then at Sam inquisitively. The big guy just shrugged; he didn't know.

Before Kensi could voice her confusion, Callen stomped around the corner and past them, swearing the whole time in what was probably Russian.

"Language, Mr Callen," scolded Hetty disapprovingly as he made his way past her.

He pouted at her but stopped his scary sounding mumbling.

"Hetty," he complained, getting as close to a whine as he could without actually doing it.

Hetty didn't tolerate whining and there was no point in aggravating her as well.

"No aggravation requires that sort of language," she continued.

"Even when it's these?" He demanded dropping a handful of something onto her desk.

"Are those lollipops?" Deeks asked in a whisper.

"I _think_ so," Kensi responded, squinting. "The purple ones I think."

"Eurgh," Deeks said. "Purple? Everyone knows the red are better."

"Purple," Callen retorted. "Red is disgusting"

Deeks was outraged, "Bite your tongue?"

"Really?" Kensi asked her partner.

Callen just scoffed at them and turned back to Hetty with a pleading look.

"What am I supposed to do?"

Hetty picked up a piece of the offending candy by the tips of her fingers. Slowly, she unwrapped one and placed it in her mouth, smiling at the flavour.

"The only thing you can do," she replied, taking it out of her mouth and inspecting it briefly. "Enjoy your good fortune."

Callen made a frustrated noise and went back to his desk. Kensi and Deeks decided this was a good time to disappear, saying something about lunch.

Sam had had enough. His partner was slowly getting more mentally unstable than usual and becoming increasingly paranoid. Over lollipops. It was ridiculous.

What was odd that they kept on appearing, even in places that Callen had emptied - like his jacket pockets. Someone kept replenishing them. Sam was impressed. The person who was doing this must have quite a stash.

Nevertheless, he was going to find out who was doing it. He didn't know whether he was going to congratulate them or give them a good shake but he needed to know who it was. Honestly, he was veering more towards the good shake. No one messed with his partner if he could help it. No matter how funny it was. Their heads need to be in the game and G's currently wasn't.

Positioning himself as unobtrusively as he could near their desks, Sam waited.

* * *

He was going to pull a Sam and pound a punching bag. He needed to burn off some of this frustration. This was getting out of hand. No one believed him that there was a problem. Of course, there was a problem, there were lollipops everywhere. Why were there lollipops everywhere?

A terrified agent skirted around him as he strode into the changing rooms. Oops, that definitely wouldn't help his reputation around the office. Oh well. Not like he cared.

He slung his bag on a bench and went to change. There was yet another lollipop, right there on top of his clothes. Because why not? Resisting the urge to throw it into the bin he swung around making his sneakers fell to the floor, under the bench. Because of course they did. Sighing heavily, he grabbed the left one, returned it to the bench, and knelt down to grab the right on. Grasping it by the toe, he felt and heard a soft 'Thud'. Something had fallen from it.

It was another damned lollipop! He threw the shoes away from him in disgust

The noise he produced made all the staff currently in the gym jump in fright.

* * *

There was movement coming from their desks. Specifically, Callen's desk. Aha!

"It's you guys?" Sam demanded, gaping at the two meerkats as he jumped from behind the screens.

"What?" Nell asked, looking at the Agent confusedly as Eric made sure to smooth down their Team Lead's jacket.

She adjusted the little bouquet of lollipops she had just placed on his partner's desk. It looked like a bizarre bunch of flowers.

"It's you guys who have been leaving those lollipops everywhere!" Sam exclaimed, pointing a finger accusingly in their direction.

Eric blinked at him. "Well, yes," he said slowly. "Who else would it be?"

"We just wanted to cheer Callen up," Nell explained. "We know how he gets on this day and we know he loves these."

Eric nodded vigorously behind her, now looking very concerned for their personal safety.

Sam just stared at them, completely gobsmacked. Eric and Nell bit their lips and squirmed in discomfort. The mab''s face was completely expressionless.

Suddenly, loud laughter practically boomed from Sam. Eric could have sworn that the windows rattled. The man was laughing so hard that he was actually doubled over, his head nearly touching his knees. Now they were just concerned. He was attracting the attention of other Agents. It was often that you got to see the Ex-SEAL lose control. Actually, Sam never lost control.

"It was _you_," he managed to choke out between chuckles.

"Yes..." Eric answered nervously even though it was a question.

The Tech Operator exchanged a look with Nell that screamed 'should we run?'

"To cheer him up?" Sam checked, wiping at his eyes. He hasn't laughed that much in _years_.

"Uh huh," replied Nell, looking questioningly at him. "We just wanted to distract him from his thoughts. "

"No one can be negative while sucking on a lollipop," Eric interrupted.

"Exactly," agreed Nell, nodding. "Did it work?"

"Oh, you distracted him alright," Sam said with a final chuckle. "How do you know he likes those things anyway?"

Eric and Nell just gave him a look.

"What?"

"You're always complaining about the wrappers he leaves all over your car," Nell answered exasperatedly.

Sam frowned at her. "I haven't complained-"

"You do," Eric interrupted. "_All_ the time."

"Not in here," Sam said defensively

Sure, he complained about it when G was eating those damned things but he only ever ate them when he was with Sam. Sam didn't pretend to understand the thought process behind that or why his partner felt like he could eat a damn lollipop in the office or outside or even bin the damn wrappers in a trash can like a normal person instead of poking them in all possible spaces in his car (A verifiable avalanche of them had tumbled down on him when he pulled down the sun visor once). It still came down to the fact that Sam always complained as G was eating them. Not anywhere else. Could you imagine what Deeks would say if he caught them arguing over candy?

"But you do in the car," Nell explained.

"How do you know that?" Sam asked, narrowing his eyes.

"You guys really need to be more aware of when your mics are on," said Eric by way of explanation, edging behind Nell when Sam just looked at him.

Inwardly, Sam was slightly worried about what the hell the two meerkats had managed to overhear. For Agents that specialised in undercover work they really should be better at checking for things that might overhear them. Outwardly, he glared at them like it was their problem.

"Oh," was all Sam had to say from that. "Uh, you may want to tell G that it's you guys because-"

Just then Callen stomped past them, this time with Nate trailing behind him.

"I'm just saying," Nate was trying to explain, "if you're having a negative reaction to the candy due to repressed memories of your childhood you really need to stop compartmentalising them."

Callen swirled around and angrily jabbed a finger in the Operational Psychologist's direction.

"I don't have any repressed memories about goddam lollipops!" Called said hotly. "My 'negative reaction' is down to them appearing _everywhere_ I go!"

"Are you sure? Everywhere is a bit of a stretch surely?" Nate tried.

"I found them in my jacket and my gym bag. My shoes. Multiple times," Callen stressed.

Sam raised an eyebrow at Eric and Bell. They got his jacket multiple times? Impressive.

"I swear whoever is doing this is going to pay!" Callen declared and then came to a screeching halt in front of his desk.

He'd noticed the bouquet. Making an incomprehensible noise of frustration, he swept everything off his desk and stomped off to the gym. Probably to shoot something. Nate took one look at the floor, the three of them and where Callen just left before scampering after him.

"Maybe wait until he's cooled off before you own up to it," Sam advised.

Wide-eyed, Eric and Nell nodded vigorously.


	2. Of Reflections and Admissions

**AN: You all managed to persuade me :) Here's the aftermath of the Great Lollipop Caper**

"You tell him."

"No you tell him."

"He likes you more."

"He does not."

"Well, he's less likely to kill you."

"You're being ridiculous."

"I'm not telling him."

"Well, neither am I."

"We don't actually have to tell him, right?"

"Well, no, but we sort of should..."

"I'm good with not telling him."

"Eric!"

* * *

Callen had finally been persuaded to get back to work. Only after thoroughly searching his desk for any sign of the lollipops and giving all of his clothes a suspicious shake.

Thankfully, only the one Eric had added to his hoodie had fallen out and it only got a dark glare before it was kicked across the room petulantly. It skittered across the floor, ricocheting off corners and eventually coming to a halt under Hetty's desk

Sam had removed the bouquet Nell had created, privately promising himself to dole them out to his partner at some point far in the future. It would be a shame to waste them. Especially since they were his favourites. He could use them like treats.

There was still a peeved off expression on Callen's face. The whole thing had apparently really gotten to him. Sam could help but find the whole situation funny. Trust the Wonder Twins to do something totally innocent but have it backfire spectacularly. At least their hearts were in the right place. They just failed to take into account how Callen's brain worked. Hell, even Sam didn't know how Callen's brain worked after all these years. He didn't really blame his partner for being so suspicious over these magically appearing lollipops though he should have been able to apply some logic and figure out where they were coming from. Being a highly trained special agent of a special op's division and all that. Maybe he was starting to lose it.

Sam squinted at his partner suspiciously and mentally shook his head. Ok, now he was starting to sound like Eric. G snap? Yeah, right.

Still, it probably wouldn't hurt to coral the man for a guy's night to unwind some of that tension. Football or baseball was always a sure-fire way to actually get him out.

"Yes, Sam?" Callen asked, not looking up from the paperwork he was most definitely not doing.

"What?" Sam asked innocently, unable to keep a smirk off his face.

"You're staring."

"Am not."

Callen looked up and gave him an exasperated look.

"I can feel it."

"Whatever you say, G."

His partner's eyes narrowed dangerously but it didn't intimidate Sam. He just stared right back.

"I'm not going crazy," Callen insisted, knowing what Sam was thinking.

"Whatever you say."

Yep, definitely a sports night. Maybe he'll throw some steaks in there too. Get some food into him, he could just be lacking decent food. Callen's diet would drive anyone insane.

* * *

"Look, we should just go over and explain ourselves and it will be fine."

"Did you see his face earlier? He looked like he wanted to shoot something!"

"Actually, I think he did. He stormed off to the shooting range if I remember correctly."

"Not helping, Nell."

"He's not in there now, Hetty managed to drag him back to work," Nell pointed out.

"Because that's so much better."

Eric buried his face in his hands with a groan out of his fear of Callen. Hetty wouldn't allow him to harm anyone in the office, would she?

"Well, that means he doesn't have a loaded weapon."

* * *

Callen drummed his pen furiously against his desk, trying hard not to scowl at it. He didn't want Sam to be all over him about his 'Mental State'. He'd had quite enough of that from Nate, thank you very much.

Lollipops. Stupid lollipops. Why did it have to be lollipops, the one thing he used to treat himself with. They were cheap, readily available and they tasted delicious. Also, easy to store and they lasted ages, the perfect sweet for the field because you could wrap it up again (even if Sam found it disgusting).

So, why his lollipops?

He still hadn't ruled out someone trying to get at him, prank or just to freak him out.

So, what if he came across a bit paranoid? With all the attempted killings, kidnappings and being taken hostage over the years he thought he'd earned that right. It's how he stayed *_alive_* after all.

Ok, that sounded crazy even to him but this was his lollipops for crying out loud. It was such a betrayal.

* * *

"I still don't understand how you thought that anonymously giving him them was a good idea," Deeks thought out loud.

"Who doesn't like discovering sweets left for them?" Nell protested.

All three agents, well an agent, a tech operator and a detective, looked at her.

"What?"

"Really?" Deeks asked incredulously.

"It was meant to be a nice surprise," Eric quickly defended.

"Woah," Deeks said, holding his hands up. "I'm not accusing you of anything. Just wondering."

Nell and Eric exchanged disgruntled looks.

"Who goes around leaving highly skilled, special agents suspicious unidentifiable food items?" he continued.

"He's got a point," Kensi said sympathetically. "It's just asking to be considered an attempted poisoning."

"When you put it like that," Eric said with a crestfallen expression.

Everyone fell silent and mulled over the whole incident, Nell and Eric looking regretful.

Then it started. First, it was a snort from Kensi, then Deeks couldn't contain it. He chuckled, lowly at first but it soon became uncontrollable. Which of course sparked Kensi off. It didn't take long after that for all four of them to be doubled over in laughter, clutching at their stomachs.

"Did you see his face?" Deeks managed to choke out, wiping tears from his eyes.

"I-it was so confused," Kensi gasped.

"Don't forget angry," Eric added. "I've never seen him look that furious before."

Kensi coughed at that. The two meerkats looked at her suspiciously.

"We have," Deeks piped up, the two turned to him. "At terrorists."

Eric groaned loudly.

"I've sure if you just explained yourselves," Kensi said encouragingly, elbowing Deeks.

"Ow! What? Oh, um, yes," Deeks said to them. "Just say what you said to us."

"Think he'll be okay with it?" Nell asked, nerves returning to her.

Deeks and Kensi exchanged a look that made Eric and Nell's stomachs sink to the toes of their shoes.

"Sure," Deeks said, scratching the back of his head unsurely.

Kensi just grimaced at them.

Not exactly the best vote of confidence...

* * *

"You know, he's not going to hear your thoughts no matter how hard you stare at him."

Eric and Nell quickly spun around in fright only to relax slightly when they noticed who it was.

"Nate!" Nell scolded.

"I'm not the one hiding in plants," the psychologist said mildly.

"Were not hiding!" Eric protested. "We're thinking."

"Thinking?"

"Of a plan of action," Nell explained.

"How's that going?"

The look the two exchanged was more than enough explanation for Nate.

"The longer you leave it, the worse you'll be off," he warned.

"We know," Eric said dolefully.

"We're just trying to figure out the optimal time," said Nell, lifting leaves so she could see more clearly.

"With the most witnesses," Eric added.

That definitely wasn't a bad idea, Nate thought.

"Do you think that the fact that he's working again is a good sign?" Nell asked.

"He's working again?" Nate queried incredulously, hunch in down by the plant to see for himself.

Last time he'd walked past, Callen wasn't even trying to pretend he was working.

"Want to tell me *_why_* you're all crouching behind a fern?"

All three of them jumped at the sound of their Assistant Director's voice. He was just behind them with his arms crossed and an eyebrow raised.

"Actually, I think this one is a ficus," Eric said fingering the leaves. His voice trailed off as he noticed the expression on Granger's face. "Or a fern," he squeaked out.

Granger's eyebrow just rose further. Eric gulped. Nell resisted the urge to sigh in exasperation.

"Their trying to muster up the courage to tell Callen," Nate explained for them.

Granger cocked his head to one side and his default frown lessened somewhat. That meant he was amused. They thought.

"Just do it," he instructed, fed up with all of this nonsense.

* * *

"So, it was you two?" Callen checked, his tone a mixture of accusing and confused.

Both their heads bobbed nervously.

"Yes?" Eric replied, biting his lip so hard that it was almost certainly going to draw blood.

Callen stated at them for a long time, it was really so he could try and organise his thoughts but it also had the added benefit of making them squirm. Good. It was only a fraction of what he had been feeling all day.

Oh, he wasn't mad at them. He couldn't be, not really. Callen was more annoyed that he hadn't figured it out for himself. They'd actually had to come up and admit to it. There was definitely something wrong there. He was off his game. But it *_was_* his lollipops. Still.

"So, you're not mad?" Eric double checked.

Callen hid his smile but shook his head.

"I'm not mad."

"Oh, thank goodness," Nell breathed, shoulders finally relaxing.

Eric just went kind of limp looking in his relief. He even had to clutch at a chair to stop himself from falling over!

"Just don't do it again," Callen told them.

"Oh, we won't," Eric confirmed fervently, regaining the power of speech.

"Just *_give_* them to me next time," he said.

"See? That wasn't too bad," Nell said as they walked back upstairs, having finished the conversation with Callen.

"Speak for yourself," Eric muttered. "I still feel all wobbly."

Nell rolled her eyes at him. He could be *_so_* dramatic sometimes.

"Told you he wouldn't shoot us."

* * *

Callen muttered something under his breath. He sounded annoyed, incredulous and exasperated all at once. Impressive for a man of allegedly few emotions.

"Something bothering you, G?" Sam asked, amused and wondering what on earth was in those reports that garnered that reaction.

Sam was kind of glad that it was the reports that garnered that sort of outburst and not Eric or Nell. It seemed like the three of them had made up after the two meerkats came clean.

The muttering from his partner got louder.

"G?"

Callen looked up from his desk and glared at his partner. Sam raised an eyebrow. He sulked.

"Now, I want a lollipop."

Sam blinked at his utterly disgruntled partner and laughed. He laughed long and hard as Callen's frown deepened into a glare and he folded his arms.

Of course, this whole series of events didn't put G off those damned lollipops. He really shouldn't have expected otherwise.

Shaking his head, Sam fumbled in his drawer before deftly grabbing what he was looking for and lobbing it at Callen's head.

Automatically reaching out to catch it, Callen inspected the object closely. It was one of the lollipops from the bouquet. It even had the ribbon still attached.

Despite his misgivings, Callen's fingers automatically unwound the familiar plastic wrapping and it was quickly shoved into the corner of his mouth. Yep, still his favourite flavour. He pouted. Sam laughed. It just wasn't fair.

"Stupid lollipops."


End file.
